Sunday, May 29, 2005

Home and other Musings

Jillian and I returned from Washington this afternoon and we immediately settled into our preferred mindless activities - Jillian settled in with the cats, a blanket, and the couch, and I turned on the Playstation. Tonight, after a fabulous chicken dinner with Sister Kate and Father Phil, I stumbled across an article in the Washington Post arguing that theology provided a weak defense against stem cell research.


Let me make this much clear – any embryo created for the soul purpose of death through research is murdered. Research on other forms of stem cells is moral, but to create life for the soul purpose of experimenting on it until death is evil. We can hide behind words like, wrong, immoral, improper, ethically questionable, but it is truly evil. How can you call the death of a helpless life anything but evil?


What makes stem cell research evil is intent. If you are fully complicit in any issues surrounding the death of an embryo or fetus, you are guilty of murder. Stem cell research, therefore, is the expressed creation of life for use in death-resulting experiments.


There is no excuse for such behavior – we must treat all beings with dignity as all are created in the image of God. Those who are not fully complicit in the death of an embryo or fetus are not guilty of the same mortal sin as those whose will is in league with the culture of death. Why must we always make shades of gray from issues that are black and white?

Friday, May 27, 2005

My wife and I are away for the weekend - look for a post next week (or this weekend if we're really, REALLY, bored!)

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Truth and Love

Today has been a good day (at least so far!). I have managed to handle all the phone calls and emails that tend to crop up over night and clear my desk of those 'hot-button' issues. This means I might actually tackle my to-do list this afternoon! For those of you that work behind a desk of any kind, you know what an achievement that really is!


Last night I had an anxiety attack, but I took some medication and talked to my brother, and while I feel far better than I did, I still worry about him. More precisely, I hope our relationship will endure this rift between my parents and I, if for no other reason than my counseling will take so long to complete. I appreciate any prayers you might offer for wisdom and love within my family.


During Morning Prayer today, this line struck me - so here is some scripture and reflection:

Psalm 57: May God send his truth and his love.


What a perfect appeal for us to offer the Lord! Jesus Christ is our Father's truth and love made real in flesh and blood every day in the Holy Eucharist. Each day we have the opportunity to accept God's unconditional love for us and share in the full body of the Church, as the Lord intends it to be, through the Precious Body and Blood.

Our Lord Jesus accepted humanity to bring us God's truth and love. May we have the strength and will to say 'yes!' to his message and calling, and live faithfully together as Church. Lord Jesus, give us the strength to accept our own humanity so we can accept your unconditional love and share in the entirety of your Church, for you created us in your image and you call to us constantly. Amen!


And just for's a list - the x's are next to thing's I've done. Credit to Hey, I'm Country for providing the list.

(  ) smoked a cigarette
(  ) smoked a cigar

(  ) made out with a member of the same sex
(X) been in love
(X) been dumped
(X) stolen
(  ) been fired
(X) been in a fight
(X) snuck out of my parent's house
(X) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
(  ) been arrested
(  ) made out with a stranger
(  ) gone on a blind date
(X) lied to a friend
(X) had a crush on a teacher
(X) skipped school
(  ) slept with a coworker
(  ) seen someone die
(  ) had a crush on one of your blogging friends
(X) been to Canada

(X) been to Mexico
(X) been on a plane
(  ) thrown up in a bar
(X) purposely set a part of myself on fire
(  ) eaten Sushi
(  ) been snowboarding
(  ) met someone in person from the blogosphere
(X) been in an abusive relationship
(X)  taken painkillers
(X) love someone or miss someone right now
(X) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) made a snow angel
(X) had a tea party
(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves
(X) gone sledding
(X) cheated while playing a game
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school
(  ) used a fake id
(X) watched the sun set
(X) felt an earthquake
(X) touched a snake
(X) slept beneath the stars
(X) been tickled
(X) been robbed
(X) been misunderstood
(X) pet a reindeer/goat
(X) won a contest
(X) run a red light
(  ) been suspended from school
(X) been in a car accident

(X) had braces
(X) felt like an outcast
(X) eaten a wholepint of ice cream in one night
(X) had deja vu
(X) danced in the moonlight
(X) hated the way you look
(X) witnessed a crime
(  ) pole danced
(X) questioned your heart
(X) been obsessed with post-it notes
(X) squished barefoot through clay
(X) been lost
(X) been to the opposite side of the country
(X) swam in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
(X) cried yourself to sleep
(X) played cops and robbers
(  ) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
(X) sung karaoke
(X) paid for something with only coins
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls
(X) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) danced in the rain
(X) written a letter to Santa Claus
(X) been kissed under a mistletoe
(X) watched the sun set with someone you care about
(X) blown bubbles
(X) made a bonfire
(  ) crashed a party
(X) gone roller-skating

(x) had a wish come true
(  ) humped a monkey
(  ) worn pearls
(  ) jumped off a bridge
(X) screamed penis in class
(  ) ate dog/cat food
(  ) told a complete stranger you loved them

(X) kissed a mirror
(X) sang in the shower
(  ) have a little black dress
(X) had a dream that you married someone
(X) glued your hand to something
(  ) got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
(  ) kissed a fish
(X) worn the opposite sexes clothes
(  ) been a cheerleader
(X) sat on a roof top
(X) screamed at the top of your lungs
(  ) done a one-handed cartwheel
(  ) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(X) stayed up all night
(X) didn't take a shower for a week
(X) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(X) climbed a tree
(  ) had a tree house
(  ) are too scared to watch scary movies alone
(X) believe in ghosts
(  ) have more then 30 pairs of shoes
(  ) worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
(  ) gone streaking
(  ) played ding-dong-ditch
(X) played chicken
(X) been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(X) been told you're hot by a complete stranger
(X) broken a bone
(X) been easily amused
(  ) caught a fish then ate it
(X) made porn
(  ) caught a butterfly
(X) laughed so hard you cried
(X) cried so hard you laughed
(X) mooned/flashed someone
(X) had someone moon/flash you
(X) cheated on a test
(  ) have a Britney Spears CD
(X) forgotten someone's name
(X) slept naked
(  ) French braided someone's hair
(X) gone skinny dippin in a pool (pond)
(X) been kicked out of your house
(  ) ridden a horse bareback
(  ) eaten a lobster you caught yourself
(  ) killed another human being

Copy and paste to your own journal and adjust the x's accordingly

Wednesday, May 25, 2005


I am thrilled! I just made goal for the year, and it looks like we will do well in exceeding goal so that with our pledge default rate, I might still have a chance at staying over goal by the end of FY 05! Excellent!


Here is a reflection for you: Matthew 21: 29-34

As they left Jericho, a great crowd followed him. Two blind men were sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was passing by, they cried out, "Lord, Son of David, have pity on us! The crowd warned them all to be silent, but they called out all the more, "Lord, Son of David, have pity on us!" Jesus stopped and called them and said, "What do you want me to do for you?" They answered him, "Lord, let our eyes by opened." Moved with pity, Jesus touched their eyes. Immediately they received the gift of their sight, and followed him.


The message for us here is clear: Set aside the fear and pride that so often keeps us silent to call out to the Lord and ask him for his grace, love, help and assistance. If faith is our true inspiration, we cannot be silent as it is only with and through Jesus that we embrace the crosses we carry and love unconditionally in return. We are too frequently like these blind men, or like the disciples before the resurrection, unable to see Christ in our daily struggles. If we have strength to lay down our fear and pride at the foot of the cross, and call out to Christ, he will pity us out of his unconditional love and answer our call.

Monday, May 23, 2005

Half way through the day and feeling good. Jillian and I had some very good discussions yesterday, and I feel as if my ship righted itself this morning. I reflected on my morning prayer readings today, and I am certain that my calling toward the Cursillo movement is legitimate. I made my offer to Steve C. to serve as web-master but have not yet heard from him. I hope to spend more time in prayer about this soon.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Franklin Covey

This has been a rough weekend. I have been struggling with my anxiety from Friday night, even up until today. Jillian has been wonderful, supporting me, encouraging me to spend time with friends, to go out and practice ‘domesticity.’ We do enjoy that time together.


It is hard to describe the anxiety I experience. It makes me irritable, angry, sad, and helpless. I visited the Adoration Chapel yesterday and spent an our with the Blessed Sacrament, hoping for strength and asking for the courage to embrace this cross and to keep my heart and will open to the Spirit and unafraid to do what has to be done.


I almost feel as if I had come to a good place, and then the rug swept away from under my feet and I tumble endlessly downward. I hope I will find the bottom soon.

Thursday, May 19, 2005


I did not realize just how tired a person could become after being on the first tee at 5:50 a.m.and walking 18 before coming to work. I played terribly. I could find no consistency with my shots. I would be either entirely on the money or as far from good as humanly possible. Still, after striking a few balls well I am convinced that I should return for yet another round. In playing with Joe, he seemed extraordinarily friendly and neither of us has spent much time with the other lately.

I feel much less depressed today. I would not quite quantify myself as happy, but I am not sad, either. I think if I possessed more energy, I would be decidedly more chipper. I managed to pray both Morning Prayer and Late Afternoon Prayer today, and that always helps me stay focused. I also backed up my hard-drive to the network and opened up a beta storage site on AOL. I will round out the housework by taking care of some filing over a cup of coffee. I have been neglecting that pile for days.

I compiled the latest reunion numbers and we are just north of $25,000 from goal. Given that a few large donors have yet to make gifts, I am confident we can reach goal. In working late last night, I crossed many tasks of my list, and I hope to tackle the immense number of contact reports that I have ignored later this evening. They are not a chore to write, but simply eat up time and sometimes make you feel unproductive.

I read a bit about Medjugorje today, and I realize that my devotion to the Blessed Mother has lapsed over the last six months. My dedication to the rosary has fallen by the wayside, and Jill and I must pray more as a couple. There is truth to the adage of praying together and being married together!

Plans for tonight include building a futon, a small supper, and to bed early!

Wednesday, May 18, 2005


This afternoon has been one of highs and lows. At lunch I found myself isolated and feeling emotionally overwhelmed. My conversation with Jillian did little to alter my depression, but instead found me misinterpreting her words and using them to spiral ever downward. I felt, for a few moments, what a person in absolute despair experiences, and the hoplessness it brought almost made me faint. I have recovered a bit since then, after taking shelter in my office for a few hours, practicing some mindless activity and reading a short passage from the Gospel of Matthew. I think now, that with a good cup of coffee, I will be able to open my door again and re-enter what feels like the land of the living.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005


While I've written for some time in a personal journal, I wanted a sense of community, and so I am beginning a journal here on AOL. I hope that my posts will be well written, fairly read, and of considerable substance. I look forward to writing and joining the greater AOL community!