Here is your roundup for April 4, 2006:
From the "Are you really going to try and stuff that enormous bag into an overhead compartment department": Taking a flight soon? Happen to be going on Delta? Might want to think again!
From the "World is going to hell and we spend way too much time worshipping celebutanuts columnists": You know she'll look good in black and white when covered in filth - but does she even understand charity?
For the "Geeks R l33t" department: Your dream job is with the Census Bureau!
And from the "There is hope the world ISN'T going to hell, save the children" section: Two Kids enter - ONE KID LEAVES! CAGE-MATCH SPELLING BEE
Tag: Spelling Bee, Census Bureau, Paris Hilton, Delta